emotional hockey by moonlight

Emotional Hockey By Moonlight

The times we live in are precarious. I looked up that word to see if it meant what I thought. It does. It means uncertain, unstable, perilous, governed by things outside of our control.

This past week I feel like the times have been playing hockey with my emotions.

So…many awful and wonderful things going on in the world. Like two teams fighting for my heart as if only happy or sad could have the puck and when one succeeds in making a point it scores – and the emotions go wild.

Not a fun game. I’d rather play real hockey. It is much safer.

All the stuff fighting for our emotional attention can be quite taxing.

Especially for people who are of an emotional or empathetic nature. Which is me. Some people have labeled them HSP’s but I refuse the label.

I refuse to be confined by what someone has noticed and then qualified by their explanation. I can learn from it but I refuse to let it define me. I find I am like that a lot. If you tell me I have no choice I will set out to prove you wrong. That can be both good and bad.

I would like to introduce you to players in the game. You may recognize them. Many have been in the news or on Facebook and what not. I’m pretty sure you will know which team they are on.

Perhaps they have been playing hockey with your emotions or maybe your team has different players.

The Players

The Orlando shooting at Pulse. Awful. Awful. Awful. No one deserves that. I don’t care what you believe. It is just awful. I found it overloaded my emotions and I had a difficult time speaking to it due to the magnitude of its awfulness. But there were those who did wonderful compassionate things. One man made crosses for the victims. See HERE  A group of people dressed as angels showed up at a memorial of a victim barring the awfulness of another group that dared to picket (Westboro makes me want to throw up). See HERE.

A two-year-old is snatched away from his daddy by an alligator right in front of him while on vacation to Disney World. Vacation at Disney! How many ways is that awful? There were those who had the audacity to blame the dad. Really? That audacity overloaded my emotions so I could not speak. But a mom did. A mom who had been at that exact same location with her toddler only one hour before stating something to the effect of it could have happened to her. See HERE. What compassion.

A child falls into a gorilla pen at a zoo and they have to shoot the gorilla to save the kid. People post and write about how awful the mom is or how awful the zoo is. Really? It became so apparent how easy it was for people to judge others from their computer. Again I didn’t know what to say. But someone did. They wrote an open letter to the arrogant perfect parents. See HERE. Thank you, Jesus!

Parents making videos of shaving their kids head to openly shame them for something they did wrong. One was for bullying a cancer patient. It boggled my mind how that parent didn’t see that as bullying their child. Having been on the receiving end of public shaming I found this so appalling I could not speak. But someone did. They wrote confronting the shaming and blaming. See HERE.   I was so glad. I shared it. It was the only thing I felt the power to do.

A college student rapes a woman and leaves her behind a dumpster. It takes over a year for the trial. He gets only six months. Awful. Just writing this makes me want to hurl. How is one supposed to respond to such awfulness? Many did. Hurling insults, railing accusations, and pointing fingers. But someone else wrote something highly constructive. Amanda Howell wrote a post that got shared over and over and over and finally I had the pleasure of reading it. She spoke to it with finesse. She acknowledged the heinousness of not taking responsibility (as apparently, Brock blamed everyone else for his behavior). She said how she cannot change those things (among other awful things she addresses) but states what she could do. Read it HERE.

Those are stories in the news.

We also have stories that are closer to home, in our own lives…

My eight-year-old grandson’s classmate’s mom died of cancer. Awful. Again I fell into my emotions too strong to be constructive. But my daughter responded with love. She took her eight-year-old son to the funeral of a mom of an eight-year-old. What compassion. What a lesson for her son.

My son and daughter in law had a miscarriage last year. Awful. They are now expecting their rainbow baby. Just last night was the gender reveal party surrounded with love and joy. I had the privilege of being present both at the awful and the joyous.

My mother in law has Alzheimer’s. Awful insidious disease. Beyond words to describe. Until one day I was given the words in a short story – A Bird Named Payn.

All the stuff fighting for our emotional attention can be quite taxing. Click To Tweet

Can you identify the teams?

  • Those hurling hatred and blame, tearing people down.
  • Those who have scored with love and compassion.
  • People sitting on the bench with apathy or overwhelmed by their emotions.

I have sat on the bench being overwhelmed by my emotions. I’m addressing that in my life because I want to play on the winning team of love and compassion more often and with greater skill.

Play on the winning team of love and compassion. Click To Tweet

I want to be like the moon in people’s darkness because I believe that scores a win.

be the moon

…by love serve one another. For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this; Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.

Galatians 5:13b-14 KJV

What next:

  • Do you get overwhelmed by your emotions?
  • Will you play on the team of compassion?
  • Share this to encourage others to join the team of empathy and compassion.
  • Do you struggle with knowing YOU are loved? Get Love’s Manifesto – here & free – You’re worth it!

You Matter!

DARE to BELIEVE it!

Here is a free tool to help you understand your true worth.


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Danielle Bernock
Author, Coach, and Speaker helping men, women, and organizations EMERGE with clear vision of their value, TAKE ownership of their choices, and CHART a path to their promise, becoming Victorious Souls who Embrace The Change from survive to thrive through the power of the love of God

Danielle Bernock

Author, Coach, and Speaker helping men, women, and organizations EMERGE with clear vision of their value, TAKE ownership of their choices, and CHART a path to their promise, becoming Victorious Souls who Embrace The Change from survive to thrive through the power of the love of God

This Post Has 12 Comments

  1. Christy Milioto

    Beautifully wriiten! I want to be on the team of empathy and encouragement, this world needs more and more of that and less and less judgement!

    1. Danielle Bernock

      Thank you, and you are so right!

  2. Michael

    Wow! That was so powerful!

    1. Danielle Bernock

      thanks!

  3. Ruth

    Wonderfully written! Kudos to you as an emotional empathetic person(like myself);to address head on so many horrific events. You must be emotionally exhausted after compiling these for your blog.
    I am in agreement with you ” No Judgement” here!
    Thank for sharing,

    1. Danielle Bernock

      Thank you Ruth. Yes it was somewhat exhausting but oh so worth it. And my next post is for refueling! 🙂

    1. Danielle Bernock

      Thank you.

  4. Shayne

    I think many people feel better if they can blame someone. Rather than suffer the powerlessness of the notion that horrible incidents (like the Disney and zoo incidents) can just happen, they feel better thinking such events are preventable. So they blame the parents. Want to stop animals from attacking children? Just stop parents from being bad. It’s far simpler than trying to decipher what chain of events led to the incidents and working to correct it from happening again. It’s far simpler and more comforting to blame inanimate objects rather than deal with the intricacies of mental illness or the fear of evil people. I don’t think the people that do these sorts of things are bad. I think they’re just scared. (except the Westboro church people. They’re evil.)

    1. Danielle Bernock

      Good points Shayne! Regarding what you said about working to correct it from happening again – yesterday i was a the Detroit Zoo and they are moving the enclosure lines back making it more difficult to get into the exhibits. I had not noticed before how some of them were quite easy to get into. Guess it didn’t used to matter. Times are different so we need to be also.

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