How the Power of Instead Can Work For You

How the Power of Instead Can Work For You

 

Instead is a powerful word. It means substitute or alternative. Using the power of instead is how we can change our lives. It changed my life. More than once.

And if it can work for me, it can work for you. I’ll show you how.

 

HOW THE POWER OF INSTEAD WORKS

The power of instead works like an interception.

Interception defined:

  1. The action or fact of preventing someone or something from continuing to a destination. For example the interception of arms shipments
  2. The action or fact of receiving electronic transmissions before they reach the intended recipient. For example the clandestine interception of other people’s telephone calls
  3. In sports, an act of catching a pass made by an opposing player.

 

If you’re familiar with sports you know how it changes the direction of the game. It interrupts momentum. It has the power to change the outcome of the game.

This is the power of instead that can work for you.

The power of instead works like an interception. Click To Tweet

 

HOW I DISCOVERED THIS

The power of instead first dawned on me by the grace of God. I used to suffer horrible disorienting confusion. If you’ve read my book Emerging With Wings you know this story.

Confusion and condemnation would arise, and I would get disoriented. To address this The Pursuer gave me His words to answer those accusing thoughts. I wrote them down in the specific order they were given. They interrupted the tendency to try to figure out the “who, what, when, where, why” of it all that would allow the negative process to continue.

The words I was given interrupted the negative process.

They intercepted me from destruction I was headed for. I said them instead of what I felt like saying. Instead of what I’d always said before.

I learned to call them instead words.

When you’re going through something hard or know you will, you can prepare instead words. Click To Tweet

 

HOW THIS WORKED FOR A FRIEND

I’d never heard anyone else use instead words, or call them that at least, until I had lunch with a friend. This lovely lady shared her powerful instead story with me.

She received the instead words from a friend of a friend after being diagnosed with stage four breast cancer.

It was a through a strange gift. He gave her a figurine of a saddle. She thought it was odd so asked him why a saddle?

He replied:

When you have a bad day. Or when you feel like giving up. Look at this saddle and say to yourself I’m gonna saddle up and overcome.

Powerful.

This empowered her to push through. The will to live and fight another day is powerful. She went through chemo and radiation and had many bad days. She listened to his advice. She didn’t give up. She is now cancer free.

When you’re going through something hard or know you will, you can prepare instead words.

Using the power of instead is how we can change our lives. Click To Tweet

 

HOW THIS WORKED FOR MY SELF-ESTEEM

Many people suffer from low self-esteem. I was one of them. Changing how you see yourself can take a lot of work.

I’d done a lot of work to change and grow when I had an incident happen that caused me to come unglued. I never wanted to go through that emotional reaction again.

I needed help.

The whole story is in my book Emerging With Wings but the short story is God gave me instead words.

I called these instead words a silver bullet.

A specific short verbal response to say “instead” of what the emotions or fear wanted to say.

To find my silver bullet I needed to identify the root of my problem. I found it was a lie I believed about my value. The silver bullet forged was I Matter!

I’d say it in the face of the debilitating emotional pain. Sometimes with tears running down my face. But I’d say it. Over and over until it became a part of me. Because the silver bullet was truth.

Truth wins over lies. I matter and so do you!

Truth wins over lies. I matter and so do you! Click To Tweet

 

WHY INSTEAD WORDS WORK

The power of instead words employs the power of faith. Faith is defined in the Bible as Now faith is the assurance of what we hope for and the certainty of what we do not see. (Source and other ways of saying it here.)

The Bible uses these words to describe what faith does: calls things into existence that do not exist. (Source and other ways of saying it here.)

This is what we do when we use the power of instead and it works.

 

WHAT NOW

  • Have you ever used instead words? Please share your story in the comments.
  • Here are some instead words for your self-esteem – Dare to Embrace
  • Get a copy of my book Emerging With Wings.

 

You Matter!

DARE to BELIEVE it!

Here is a free tool to help you understand your true worth.


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Danielle Bernock
Author, Coach, and Speaker helping men, women, and organizations EMERGE with clear vision of their value, TAKE ownership of their choices, and CHART a path to their promise, becoming Victorious Souls who Embrace The Change from survive to thrive through the power of the love of God

Danielle Bernock

Author, Coach, and Speaker helping men, women, and organizations EMERGE with clear vision of their value, TAKE ownership of their choices, and CHART a path to their promise, becoming Victorious Souls who Embrace The Change from survive to thrive through the power of the love of God

This Post Has 10 Comments

    1. Danielle Bernock

      Thank you, Hanna!

  1. Joyce Walker

    I love this. Instead. The little things like instead words are life changing. Thank you!

    1. Danielle Bernock

      You’re most welcome, Joyce. I’m so glad to hear it and I couldn’t agree more – life changing.
      Thank you for sharing.

  2. Kim Scott

    Yes I know words are powerful. I guess the instead words would be what is positive and good. Faith Words! Sometimes it is hard to keep speaking right words. I guess that’s part of why we need to renew our minds with God’s word and to re-train the way we speak .

    1. Danielle Bernock

      You’re right, Kim. It can be very hard to speak words we choose instead of what we feel.

      It wasn’t easy for my girlfriend to utilize that saddle to inspire her to speak chosen words instead of discouragement when she was under pressure. It’s a lot of work.

      But it’s not about just what we say. We are quite capable of speaking empty words. The words we believe come out of our heart. That’s were the real work is done.

      But little by little we grow and we change. It’s a process. We need lots of grace and lots of encouragement from others. We’re all a work in progress.

      Not by might, nor by power…Grace Grace!

      Blessings to you!

  3. Jeanine Berthet

    Love this article😊

    1. Danielle Bernock

      Thanks, Jean. I’m so happy to hear it.

  4. Wow, I’ve never heard it phrased that way before! Definitely helpful and something I will remember for sure. One thing I’ve heard that’s worked for me is anytime you’re feeling consumed by negative voices–whether they’re voices of stress, anger, guilt, or self-doubt–rather than fighting the voices, to say “I love you” to them. Even though it feels kind of silly, it works! And I guess that’s the point–the silliness dissipates the heaviness of the negative emotions.

  5. Danielle Bernock

    Thanks, Kate. Phrasing it that way just came about through God helping me. Sometimes we need to hear things differently because everything else sounds like a pat answer.

    Thanks for sharing the way you respond with the “I love you”. It reminds me of something else I do, thanks to a former pastor of mine. When I’m in traffic and someone does something stupid, or just something I don’t like, I say “bless you” to them out loud. This dissipates the negative attitude I had toward them and helps me keep peace in my heart.

    I’ve learned the best way to make any change is through some kind of intentional instead. Because without the intention, either the change doesn’t occur or we do something else instead that might not be a good choice. For example, it’s common when people quit smoking that they eat instead and gain weight. But those who intentionally do something positive as their instead, they get a different outcome.

    Thank you for sharing!

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