Do you wish you could be fearless? Me too. However, being fearless is really a mirage. Coming to terms with that truth has empowered me so much. I spent way too much time trying to eradicate fear from my life, beating myself up in the process.
But fear is part of being human. Our bodies have a fight/flight system within them validating the reality of fear.
There’s no such thing as fearlessness unless there’s something chemically wrong with you so let yourself be human and learn how to fight fear.
When it’s time to fight fear there are 2 powerful questions to ask yourself.
WHY QUESTIONS
Fear is a powerful emotion that threatens. It causes the reaction of cowering.
By choosing to respond with a question it puts you in the place of authority instead of the fear.
Questioning the fear demands the validity of the threat to be revealed. Is it true or an exaggeration? Fear often lies and exaggerates.
Asking questions puts you in a superior position that empowers your ability to choose.
When it’s time to fight fear there are 2 powerful questions to ask yourself. Click To Tweet
THE FIRST QUESTION
One of the things fear uses to threaten us is uncertainty. We can’t control what we don’t know. This is why this first question is so powerful.
Ask yourself What?
What’s the worst that can happen?
Being honest with your answer is crucial to knowing the real cost or risk of what you’re facing.
Could you die? Could you go broke? Could you fail?
Seriously. Are those realities and what do they look like to you?
- Is death a real possibility or is it an intense emotion wanting you to run?
- What is broke to you? Living on the street, missing a payment, or not being able to buy your favorite latte?
- What would failure look like to you? How would that make you feel?
Answering this question truthfully gives you clarity of how real your risk is.
HOW IT WORKED FOR ME
I learned the power of the first question when facing an opportunity a while back.
I asked myself the question to expose the worst case scenario, and being honest with my answer gave me the clarity to assess the reality of my risk.
There was some risk, but it wasn’t as severe as the fearful emotions painted the picture in my mind. I wrote about how it all transpired so I’ll share a *link at the bottom.
Facing the worst possible outcome prepares you to ask the second question.
Christ gives me the strength to face anything. —Philippians 4:13
THE SECOND QUESTION
The answer to your first question is directly related to how deep you need to go with the second one.
Ask yourself Why?
Why do I want to do this thing?
- If you found the risk to be small or the threat to be empty your answer might simply be—why not?
- But if you found the risk to be painfully high and the threat to be real, the answer to WHY is both necessary, and pivotal.
WHY do you want to do this thing?
I discovered the power in this second question recently while brainstorming about how to celebrate my book Because You Matter’s first birthday.
It was a milestone I wanted to celebrate but fear showed up in force with what if’s.
Old trauma triggers that had long been healed presented themselves once again saying What if no one comes just like that dinner you made so many years ago? This is where I found the answer to my WHY empowering – I want to celebrate the message this book carries because it needs to reach millions. My why spoke to the fear saying: What if no one shows up? Ha! Then I’ll celebrate like a lunatic all by myself and speak to those who’ll see the video later.
I planned a party and acted as if a million people were coming but was emotionally prepared if no one came.
And the what if’s were wrong, as they so often are. Many people came to the party and we had a blast.
When your why is big enough, courage rises to prepare for any risk.
COURAGEOUS DECISION TIME
Now that you’ve identified the fear of, WHAT is the worst that can happen, you’re emotionally prepared to use your superpower called choice.
Is your, WHY you want to do this thing, bigger or smaller than the fear?
Making this informed decision will bring a sense of peace. Both a yes and no decision take courage. The fight with fear will be over as you take ownership of your decision with courage.
- A no decision means you’re done and can relax.
- A no decision that is followed by negativity or regret means you need to reevaluate your why and reconsider your decision.
- A yes decision means you need to feel and face the fear of the worst that can happen, prepare the best you can, and be all in no matter what happens.
The stronger your decision, the stronger your sense of peace and preparation.
One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn’t do. —Henry Ford
OWN THE RESULTS
You took ownership of your decision, now own the results.
Evaluate how it went and how you felt. What went well? What could have been better?
Respond to your results with celebration for the good and learn from the less than perfect, or even bad. There’s always something to celebrate and something to learn.
You win the fight with fear when you drag it out into the light, question it’s validity, and respond with intention.
You win the fight with fear when you drag it out into the light, question it’s validity, and respond with intention. Click To Tweet
WHAT NEXT
- What do you think about these two questions? Share in the comments.
- Dare to believe you can overcome get this declaration and join my community.
- *How it worked for me details HERE.
- Watch the party on Facebook HERE
- Watch the party on YouTube HERE.
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Great post! Makes facing fear simple (but not easy). I loved the quote by Henry Ford! Powerful!
Thank you, Michael. I’m glad you found it helpful. And I agree. Simple doesn’t mean easy.
Thanks for commenting!