How To Fight This Kind Of Sad

How To Fight This Kind Of Sad

 

2020 has not been kind and it’s not over yet. In the midst of this global pandemic (and all the other craziness) it’s easy to be overcome with painful emotions. Sadness, anger, confusion, fear, etc…

How are you holding up? Are you fighting to keep a good attitude and positive outlook? I know I have been fighting.

I was doing pretty good (in spite of difficult days fighting the sadness caused by the dark and combative social climate).

Then the weather sucker punched me with this kind of sad.

 

DARKNESS

It was raining and dark outside. The sun was nowhere to be found and the sad feeling of depression was chasing me like a monster. When this kind of sad comes after me it takes a fight to not succumb.

Thoughts about S.A.D. ran through my mind and the coming winter. Where I live it can get quite dreary. That compounded the sadness coming at me. I fought hard to shake it off.

We can fight this sadness caused by darkness.

 

SADness

I’ve wrestled with this kind of sad before but refuse to accept S.A.D. as a diagnosis. Especially when you read about how common it is.

Why does SAD have to have a medical diagnosis? Can’t people just be sad about their surroundings? Yes they can. Sadness is an emotion, not a diagnosis.

Any time the skies become dark and ominous it breeds SADness. It can be from a rainy day, a storm, an impending storm, the aftermath of a storm, the threat of a storm that never arrives, smoke from wildfires, shorter days of light, and smog. Maybe even something else I’m not aware of.

But we can fight this sadness caused by darkness.

 

WE CAN FIGHT

That’s why I’m writing this today. I’m thankful for that sucker punch reminding me of this kind of sadness. Why?

Because it reminded me of what I have to fight in the future. It opened my eyes to the power of preparation.

I can be proactive. I can identify things that will help me and you fight the sadness and remove, or lessen, it’s power over us.

I’ve written about what some call the blues and shared 7 things* to combat them. But that’s for in the midst of it.

 We can take ownership ahead of time and fight to win.

 

HOW WE CAN WIN

We can win by doing things that fight against sadness.

The list below is not a substitute for anyone who suffers from clinical depression. That’s serious stuff and I’m not a medical professional. So if you need medical help, please by all means get it. There is no shame is asking for help.*

 

Aromatherapy

This sounds all fancy but it doesn’t have to be. Studies show that we’re affected by smells both in positive ways and negative ways. There are scents that trigger chemicals in our brain to lift our mood and ones that trigger fond and happy memories. What smells make you happy? Surround yourself with those. It can be through candles, incense, essential oils, or even something as simple as baking a batch of cookies or cooking up some bacon.

 

Light

Having more lights on in your living space is a simple thing to do. But sometimes that’s not enough. You may need lightbulbs with a higher wattage or lumen output. There are other ways to increase your light too. They make lightbulbs that give off a full spectrum of light*, ones that mimic daylight, and they make a thing called a lightbox* specifically for this use. Investigate what will serve you best.

 

We can fight this sadness caused by darkness. Click To Tweet

 

Music

Music is known as the language of emotion. The key to tapping into this tool is to choose ahead of time what music feeds your joy and makes you feel happy or even safe. You can even play this music ahead of time during joyful celebrations and when you play it later it can trigger that happy memory. Another trick is to identify music that’s calming to you and later it can soothe your emotions – like a hug.

 

Move your body

Being sedentary can feed into sadness but moving your body increases the blood flow in the brain helping you to be happier. There are many ways to tap into this. Dancing, simple exercises, yoga, TaiChi, chair exercise… You can find YouTube videos to help if you like.

 

Do something to help someone else

This just amazes me how this works. When we’re tempted to be sad we may not feel like doing something for someone else but it will release happiness inside our bodies. How does it do this? I have a video that can help. Link below.

 

Stir up your inner laugh

I wrote an article* on this after reading one by Debi Feinman who wrote “Laughter IS the Best Medicine”. She talks about something called joy-laughter and she defines it as this: “Joy-laughter originates from within, is person specific and can’t be predicted.  Joy-laughter feels like a flood of joy that has no other way to be expressed than through laughter.  It requires no thought process, rather it is an innate expression of emotion that can be witnessed as early as infancy.” I call this our inner laugh and you can stir yours up.

 

We can take ownership ahead of time and fight to win. Click To Tweet

 

Strengthen your self-esteem*

Make a list of your good qualities and things you’ve done that had an impact on others. Go over this list at least once a week to remind yourself of your value and purpose. When you feel good about yourself you’ll be stronger against the pull of sadness.

 

Feed your mind positivity

It’s not a secret how powerful our minds are. What we feed our mind directs our lives. What we feed on profusely will come out when the pressure is on. If you’re full of positivity (scriptures, affirmations, quotes etc.), when the sadness shows up the positive will come out to fight it.

 

Plan activities

Activities can be of any kind. The point is to have things on your calendar because an empty calendar sometimes encourages sadness. But when you have places to go and things to do, the sadness will take a sideline.

 

Make an anti-sadness list

This list is comprised of things you’re grateful for, and things you love. Also, add in things you’re looking forward to which feeds hopeful expectation and joy.

 

Stay connected*

Similar to planning activities but you can do those alone. Staying connected is important. The entire world has learned this during the coronavirus pandemic. Social distancing has consequences. We’ve fought against the sadness of that with online connections. So feed your relationships – call, text, video connect, or even better get together in person – whatever you can do. Healthy vibrant relationships fight sadness well.

 

WHAT NEXT

  • How many of these will you do? Let me know in the comments.
  • Got another idea? Let me know in the comments.

Links mentioned/referenced with an *:

7 things for the blues here

Inner laugh article here.

About your self-esteem here

Do something for others video here

Full spectrum light bulb here

light box here

Connection here

Serious depression is not the blues. If you’re suffering depression please seek professional help. Love your self.

If you need to, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline  1-800-273-8255 Available 24 hours every day.

 

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Danielle Bernock
Author, Coach, and Speaker helping men, women, and organizations EMERGE with clear vision of their value, TAKE ownership of their choices, and CHART a path to their promise, becoming Victorious Souls who Embrace The Change from survive to thrive through the power of the love of God

Danielle Bernock

Author, Coach, and Speaker helping men, women, and organizations EMERGE with clear vision of their value, TAKE ownership of their choices, and CHART a path to their promise, becoming Victorious Souls who Embrace The Change from survive to thrive through the power of the love of God

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